Setting Boundaries for Self Care

Hello, lovely humans! Today, we're diving into the art of setting boundaries for self-care, or as I like to call it, "Learning to Say 'No' Without FOMO." Yes, folks, it's about turning down that extra slice of obligation pie and serving ourselves a hefty portion of personal well-being instead.

The Magic of 'No'

Once upon a time, in the not-so-far-off land of Customer Serviceville, I learned my first lesson in boundary setting. Picture this: A phone glued to my ear, a line of escalated customers, and a ticking clock. In that moment, I realized I had two choices—continue trying to be Superwoman or start understanding that I was only going to show up as my best, most calming self by taking care of my self.

Saying 'no' isn't just about refusing; it's about choosing. Choosing peace over chaos, quality over quantity, and, most importantly, you over them. Not in a selfish way, but in a "putting your oxygen mask on first" kind of way. Because guess what? You can't pour from an empty cup, and my cup was looking more like a drought-hit desert.

Boundary Setting: A Love Story

As a leadership team member, I danced the fine line between being approachable and becoming the office doormat. It was like being asked to babysit a crocodile—thrilling but not particularly healthy. Setting boundaries was my way of saying, "I love you, team, but my sanity needs its space." And it had a beautiful ripple effect… all of a sudden, I was providing an example of balance in order to show up more full, with the same amount of time.

And oh, being a mother of two? Let's just say my kids think my boundaries are more like suggestions than actual fencing sometimes. It takes a mix of love, patience, and the strategic use of "no" to teach them the importance of respect and personal space. Just like in customer service days, it's about negotiation, not dictatorship. I explain to them that when mommy has a more full battery, it is a more fun experience for us all. And again, they are learning to share back when they need space. Teaching emotional intelligence and communicating about what they need will be a huge plus for all of their future relationships some day.

The Best Yes

So, how do we say this magical 'no'? First, understand that 'no' is a complete sentence. No explanations needed, no guilt trips allowed. It's about respecting your limits and honoring your needs. And remember, every 'no' to something else is a 'yes' to yourself. What a beautiful reframe and can you imagine what that ‘yes’ to yourself will do long term? Oh… just remind yourself how important and worthy you are of getting what you need in life - confidence and empowerment are born there. Understand this is not a single conversation - these boundaries will be tested, but remaining steadfast will ensure that you rewire and confirm to your brain what is important for you.

To my fellow people-pleasers, boundary setting is not about building walls; it's about installing gates. Gates you can open and close at your discretion, allowing you to manage your energy and show up as your best self. It is truly a win-win… and its okay to begin with the idea that it is for others….